Jaybirds

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Jaybirds

Once in a little forest area,
just outside my cabin window,
I was watching the little animals and birds play.
I had some of those hummingbird feeders
that the hummingbirds dip their long needle like beaks into and take little cool sips of sweet honey flavored water.
I liked to color mine red or orange so I could see how much was left in them.
The humming birds seemed to stand still in the air while they sipped at the red liquid.Their tiny wings moved more quickly than could be seen.
The buzzing sound I could hear from that part let me know that the wings were moving, holding the bird up in the air.
It was so pleasant to watch the humming birds at their drinkers, sipping contently then flying off, only to return again and again to satisfy their thirst for what they needed.
It seemed like they couldn't drink deeply of the liquid and they had to return many times, and continue to repeat the process in order to satisfy that need.
They take turns, never having to wait in line, or bump another about, only waiting somewhere, away from the drinker, until their turn, then quietly taking a turn from the cool red liquid.

I had some pine cones that I had dipped in peanut butter and covered with bird seed and other grains that I hung from the pine tree,and around them. The other little birds of the forests gathered as if they were meeting together to plan the activities of their day.
They seemed to be attracted to the peanut buttery smell that came from the pine cones, and perhaps, they were sharp enough with their smellers that they could even smell the nuts and grains that stuck fast to it.
One day, while I was watching these birds from my window,
I was washing the dishes and kind of began to day dream and think about my own friends at home and friends I had when I was younger, and just thinking about special people in my life and the things about them that made them very special.
I noticed that two jay birds were arguing and fighting over one of the pine cone feeders, as if each one had a right to it and should keep the other away.

Some birds are like people, in that way, they might think that their friends should do everything just the way they do it or they want them to do it. So one jay was screeching at the other and flapping his wings and flying high and diving at the other, and the other jay was fluttering around trying to avoid the attack of the other, then began to attack back, so pretty soon feathers were flying in every direction and you might imagine the noise of the two screeching birds was enough to drive all the other animals back into the forest or into their nests to be sure they could feel safe from the sights and sounds of the fighting birds. Animals prefer to be in a safe comfortable place, a pleasant place when things are not going quite right.

The terrible sounds they made, fighting, they seemed to be calling one another terrible names and saying that only one could be right and the other had to be wrong then; didn't they know there are many ways to do things, and not just one right or wrong way. It was like they wouldn't allow any difference, things had to be done as they thought, or it was wrong.
I could almost hearing them demanding that they control the other birds.

As they fought they even broke branches on the pine tree, and I remember that piney smell that it made, a different smell than when I burned the branches in the fireplace,
and even different than when...
the sun shone on the branches and warmed them up.

Those sharp pine needles brushing and poking against the birds as
they dove and flew at each other,
the hard bumping feeling as they hit and pummeled one another. . . it was hard to watch and hard to listen to and became a pretty unpleasant scene. . .
I had to wonder why they were fighting, because I knew there were other pine cone feeders out there that
smelled of peanut butter and pine scent and had all the crunchy seeds and nuts on them as this one did, but somehow both of these Jays thought they had to have that very one, and didn't seem to think that they could share it.


Each bird seemed to think it had to have the just opposite of what it already had.
Maybe at a time in your past you've had an experience, where what you thought you had to have.
. . became the opposite of what
you came later to believe. .
a change with time, a change in the way you think, at this time


Like the Jay birds might have discovered had they taken the time to think about what they were fighting over. But we know these are birdbrains and cannot really think things through, only act at the time according to that nature.

Perhaps if the Jay birds would take that time and think things through, they might remember pleasant times together, in the trees with the sun shining on them, and the glitter of the light streams through the branches of the trees, down onto the cushions of fallen leaves on the forest ground below.

While you think about what the Jay birds might have been fighting over at that time, or imagine the pleasant experiences they might have had together at other times, you might want to take the time to go way way back
into your own childhood and find there some past pleasant memories
that you haven't thought about for a long time; because many things happened to you already in your own childhood things that were fun
things that were important

Right now, the most important thing is that you allow your inner mind to began to learn
to separate out
one thing from another
to begin to work
and sort through those childhood memories
to find one that is just pleasant enough and I want you
to enjoy that process
experience those feelings
when you find that pleasant memory
get inside that memory
notice the smells and sounds and tastes. You can even feel the feelings, the temperature of that pleasant time, and the feeling of the clothes your were wearing, their color and smell. The whole earth could have stopped right at that place in time and you would have to write a whole book to describe the experience in time and space, and color and sound, the feelings of what goes on because inside that memory is enjoyment for your own active mind.

And inside that memory is the foundation
that your inner mind
can use to build an entirely new learning;

Now inside that memory
that pleasant memory
something is occurring;
do you know what the name of that something is?

there is no need to say it out loud,
no need to tell me about it or any one else,
just remember the name you give it;
that is a set of words
that you can remember later on.
Maybe you can see the words in your mind like writing over a picture of that pleasant time,
, or hear the sound of the words--feel the shape they make as you write them on your own private tablet,
Now, when you went through life
you went from one memory to another
only. they weren't even memories yet,
they were just experiences, things happening,
and as you moved from one experience to another,
you would have an enjoyable one;

but as time went on,
your enjoyment would change to something else; because there
were also experiences which were very very unpleasant
some which might have really scared you;
some which you fought your way through and
from which you learned a lot about living;

much like the jay birds were having such an experience out of my window, in the trees, around that feeder,

Their time had started with a pleasant experience
in the forest pine tree, playing around,
sharing a treat from a feeder, then
finding themselves fighting and
struggling to stay alive;

and as you got through those experiences,
you might have said to yourself:
"never again"
and as time went on
those unpleasant experiences faded
into the past and they became the basis
of powerful learnings about
how to cope with the world
in a way that was effective;
Ways to take care of your self
and protect yourself on a daily basis.

they were useful ways. however,
they're not nearly as useful as
what happens when you
say the name of that pleasant memory;
say the name to yourself
and as you do;
you can go back there again;
that's right;
go back inside that memory;
the pleasant one;
and find the enjoyment
; that's right;

because you forgot to do something;
you can think about what you forgot,
lots of people forget;

When you go from a pleasant experience
to an unpleasant one, you don't
use the pleasantness as a way of coping;
use the feeling of the pleasantness as a way of dealing with the daily hurts you might feel.
on the other hand when you
leave an unpleasant experience
and go to a pleasant one;
somehow or other;
its so easy to take the unpleasantness with you;
it seems foolish somehow but yet
it is easier that way.

Perhaps that is why the Jay birds were fighting over the pine cone feeder, with the peanut butter and grains,
maybe they forgot to
remember the pleasant feelings of getting along and
playing gently together, sharing the tastes and feelings of the day,
and they only took the fear of going without food,
or the fear of being left behind, left out of the flock,
And if you take some time;
take a deep breath;
and let that unpleasant memory really fade away;
and then move forward and
go back into that pleasant memory
that enjoyable memory;
and when you're in that memory
this time you
tell yourself" I'll never forget this again:"
because some things . . . are a resource;
that you want to take with you;
some things are helpful to have with you all the time
saved away where you can
get to them at any time you might need them,

and some things are a burden;
the things that won't help you, or even might get in the way of your having a pleasant time,
enjoying your friends, and making life for yourself pleasant and comfortable and safe.
and those things, that drag you back are no longer needed;


If you have a bad experience, maybe you have had one just today,
and you
say to yourself; "never again:"
you can trust that your inner mind will allow you to
know what to avoid in the future;
and if you say, " a few moments ago I forgot to
take that pleasant memory with me;
and I felt all those bad feelings;
and I'm never going to do that again;

And I thought about those birds, outside of my window and wondered if they could
say those things, because I had seen them fighting before, and I think that is something they really don't enjoy doing to each other or having happen to themselves.

I wondered if they could
remember the pleasant time,
remember that earlier time before the fighting,
could they
go back into that enjoyment;
go into that pleasant memory;
and perhaps remember another one that 's
even more pleasant
find one that may even have a giggle under it or
a giggle over it...
perhaps one that has tenderness;
perhaps one that just has a lot of fun;...
because you went through your childhood;
you become a school kid and you made it this far;
but since you've made it so far,
that's no reason for you give up all the good things
its much more effective to
take them with you;

See what is the most pleasant memory your unconscious
mind can find
you can consciously look for memories,
but unconsciously you know how to
sort through memories much faster,
like a computer and more effectively;
your unconscious knows much more about your own experience
than I do and it can sort through memories at a high speed , until it finds one that it thinks your conscious mind would never have thought about,
which is pleasant in a very special way;
It can find more than one if it chooses;
it might show you a piece of one, a fragment of another;
it might show you a whole sequence of pleasant memories;
and as it does so; you might not realize it,
but you're doing the same thing you did
every day of your childhood for the first four years
and every day after that;
you're sorting through memories and experiences
trying to make sense of them;
in a way that's useful; and if you
find that thread that allows you to
have a good feeling,
very very slowly, I want you to
feel the palms of your hands,
begin to touch one another slowly
the warmth and texture
and as they come together I want you to
keep those good feelings; and I want you to
see your friends doing that special thing
that they do that seems so unpleasant;
that behavior that in the past you didn't like;
and I want you to see them do it;
and keep those good feelings;
and know how good it can feel
to have somebody special in the world;
that's right; the most special unique
experience that a person can have,
is to have a special friend;
some one who is special for them.

Now sometimes, because they are our friends
, and we spend a lot more time together than with other people,
or share a lot more things, or because
they are our brother or sister,
we live in the same house and share a lot of time and experiences, we start to scold and yell like the jay birds
, or even strike each other, making them feel bad;
when we forget that special feeling and we think what we are fighting about is more important
that is a terrible waste.

When you see your friend, or sibling doing that behavior that makes you feel angry or frustrated,
you will have palms on your hands; and if you
feel that good feeling inside you,
that pleasant thread of enjoyment,
not only will you have your palms,
but you'll have someone special in them.

Now I don't know, if you feel that you can afford to do other wise; but I know that as I go through life,
it is important to me
to be able to appreciate and to enjoy all the qualities
that make a special person unique
and individual
not just some of them, because what
you're learning here is not just a way
that your unconscious can assist you in
taking one piece of behavior and making it tolerable,
but a way in which you unconscious can begin to
appreciate every idiosyncratic piece of behavior;


I remember when I was little I'd get a sandwich the first thing I'd do is peel the crust off and feed it to my dog; I had to be very careful about this because my mother believed that the crust was the best part
; but as time went on, I discovered that not all breads tasted like rubber;
I discovered that there were some breads on which the crust really did taste good
and I discovered that as time went on my own tastes...
changed.... from one thing to another;
and as your tastes change;
and you learn to appreciate something
that you didn't before
it makes you aware and more alert
to just exactly what it is
that make something important;


Now above and beyond all this
there's something else going on here
which is that you have begun
a process
which can continue for many years
about learning to use your unconscious resources to
go deeper into yourself if you wish to
or just to communicate
with your unconscious mind for the purpose of learning and changing

Now as I watched the jay birds fighting, I realized that one or the other had suddenly discovered the other pine cone feeders in the trees and the sun was shining right down through the branches of the tree on them, as they seemed to decide that sharing the same one was not such a terrible thing after all. And when they stopped their quarreling, the other little animals and birds
begin to sneak back out into the sunshine to enjoy the rest of their day knowing that they might
be able to learn many things from the jay birds and from their pleasant experiences throughout the rest of the day.

I don't know if the birds could really
make changes in their behavior,
in the way they treat each other each day,
because birds have to do what they are designed to do,
but people have minds, and minds are important to be able to
change the way we act and the
way we treat each other.

It is our minds that help us to
have pleasant experiences and
have learnings from these special, pleasant experiences each day.